So I was chatting with a friend and she started telling me about a woman she met. In a nutshell, what was supposed to be a short meeting turned into a long mostly one-sided discussion about the other woman’s “expertise” and experiences.
I’ve heard this a few times from different friends. They go to a psychic fair and are browsing tables when suddenly someone accosts them and starts talking about beings in other dimensions affecting them. Or they’re having a chat about something unrelated and suddenly the “woo” stuff comes up and the next thing they know they’re being dragged down the rabbit hole when they never really planned to go sightseeing.
I hear about this particular subject because of what I do. So when someone goes “full woo” on a friend, I end up hearing about it. Sometimes with “Was that person legit, or just nuts?” or “Thank you for not doing that.”
But this can happen in almost all fields. I’ve personally been dragged into a conversation about fitness and nutrition, and found myself thinking “I don’t fucking CARE! Stop talking!”
We’ve all experienced this somewhere or other. Where the other side of the conversation just starts talking, and pretty soon we feel like we’ve been hijacked and start looking for some way – any way – OUT.
Let me say that there is NOTHING wrong with loving what you do and being enthused about it! I love talking to people who are honestly just stoked about the subject. But that brings a different energy to the conversation. In those moments, I honestly feel like I can say “Hey, I’d love to hear more, but I’m crunched right now (or, there’s someone over there I really need to talk to, or whatever). Let’s set up a time to chat again!”
If you feel you’ve been hijacked, you probably have. And while it’s never really fun, it personally makes me NUTS when spiritual practitioners do this. Two main reasons:
1. It comes off as seriously arrogant. You’re not listening if you’re talking. So you’re just rattling off as much info as possible as quick as possible to sound smart. This does not work. (You are not Zapp Brannigan and these are not pick-up lines.)
2. It can really make the person you’re talking to feel unhinged. When you start rattling off things that are outside of their current zone of understanding, you will make them super uncomfortable. It’s usually easier for them to just decide you’re nuts than for them to take ALL this stuff you’ve dumped on them and accept that it’s true.
Again, this can apply to almost any topic, but spirituality is a big one. You have to be careful how much you parse out during conversations so that you’re being helpful, but you’re not burying people in tons of info they aren’t ready for.
It doesn’t help anyone if by the end of the conversation the other person is “escaping” and has decided that one of you is crazy. When you find yourself in these conversations, weigh how much you’re putting out vs. how much the other person has asked. Trust me, if they are at all interested in what you’re saying, they’ll ask for info. Whether it’s now or later, they’ll circle back. And if they aren’t interested, you won’t waste everybody’s time.
Not everybody is your ideal audience, so why give all your info to just anyone? 😉
If you’re looking for someone to talk to about the weird and woo things in your life without feeling like you’re having too much info thrown at you, please check out the “Mystic Messenger” program. This is a great way to ask about what really interests you without committing to a full-blown course.